Battle Of The Bands: Gay Version
by secretslashlvr7392
Summary: MWPP era, Since when did James play the guitar, Pete play Bass, Remus play piano, Sirius play drums, Remus sings lead, and Sirius sings in a falsetto! And since when were two of the Marauders gay and happen to fall for each other? SBRL slash


Battle Of The Bands: Gay Version

A little different from normal Battle of the bands, MWPP era, Since when did James play the guitar, Pete play Bass, Remus play piano, Sirius play drums, Remus sings lead, and Sirius sings in a falsetto?! And since when were two of the Marauders gay and happen to fall for each other?

A/N: Yes, I know, DuplicatePenNameHere has the same story, do not fear, because I AM DuplicatePenNameHere. This is the Gay Version of Battle Of the Bands. Why? Simply because I felt like it! Enjoy!

"This year Hogwarts will be having their own Battle of the Bands competition! Now, for those of you who know what battle of the bands is, and for those who don't, I've changed it a little. You and your house members, a maximum of four per group, will get together and sign up. We will have auditions all next week, and then after those, we will be left with two bands to each house." Dumbledore said with a twinkle in his eye. "Then, for the eight weeks after that, a band will be eliminated based on your votes. It is open to all years. Are there any questions?" There was a lone hand.

"Yes, Mr. Lupin?"

"How will we choose the band we imitate?" He asked.

"Your group will decide." Dumbledore said with a smile.

"Yes!" Remus half shouted, turning bright red as he received many looks and sat back down next to Sirius and Peter.

"Excited a bit?" Sirius asked with a raised eyebrow.

Remus glared at Sirius and flushed some more. "Yes, I am. Because I know you three can sing and play instruments but are CLUELESS when it comes to bands and the like. _AND_ I have the perfect band in mind." He smirked at the look on the faces of the boys. "Don't worry, you'll like them." He said with a smile, digging into his food.

(L)(A)(T)(E)(R) (W)(I)(T)(H) (T)(H)(E) (M)(A)(R)(A)(U)(D)(E)(R)(S)

"Queen." Remus said, sitting on his bed with the record player sitting next to him as he held up a record.

"Queen? What kind of poofter name is _that_?" James asked.

"Only the lead singer is gay, so shut up. But they're really a great band. Here, I'll have you listen to a few of their songs. Pete! Pick a number." Remus said.

"Um… 4?" Peter said uncertainly. Remus held back a laugh as he recalled what number four on the record was.

"Interesting choice, Pete." He said. Soon, Fat Bottomed Girls was playing.

"_Oh you gonna take me home tonight?_

_Oh, down beside that red fire light,_

_Oh, you gonna let it all hang out_

_Fat Bottomed Girls you make the rockin' world go round._

_I was just a skinny lad_

_Never knew no good from bad_

_But I knew life before I left my nursery_

_Left along with big fat Fanny_

_She was such a naughty nanny_

_Hey big woman, you make a bad boy out of me…" _Remus stopped the music and smiled.

"Okay, James, pick a number."

"Three." He said confidently.

"_She keeps Moet and Chandon in her pretty cabinet _

_'Let them eat cake' she says _

_Just like Marie Antoinette _

_A built in remedy for Khrushchev and Kennedy _

_And anytime an invitation you can decline _

_Caviar and cigarettes well versed in etiquette _

_Extr'ordinarily nice _

_She's a killer queen gunpowder gelatine _

_Dynamite with a laser beam _

_Guaranteed to blow your mind_

_Anytime! _

_Recommended at the price _

_Insatiable an appetite wanna try?" _Remus again stopped the music.

"Pick a number, Sirius."

"Nine."

"_This thing called love I just can't handle it_

_This thing called love I must get round to it _

_I ain't ready, crazy little thing called love _

_This thing (this thing) called love (called love)_

_It cries (like a baby), In a cradle all night _

_It swings (woooh woooh), It jives (woooh woooh) _

_It shakes all over like a jelly fish, I kind of like it_

_Crazy little thing called love_

_There goes my baby, she knows how to Rock'n'Roll_

_She drives me crazy, she gives me hot and cold fever_

_Then she leaves me in a cool cool sweat._

_I gotta be cool relax, get hip! _

_Get on my tracks, take a back seat _

_Hitch hike, and take a long ride on my motor bike_

_Until I'm ready, crazy little thing called love_."

"Hey! I was about to play along!" James pouted, getting his air guitar ready. The others laughed as Remus picked a song.

"Here, this one is my favorite." He said, playing the song.

"_It started out so well_

_They said we made a perfect pair_

_I clothed myself in your glory and your love_

_How I loved you_

_How I cried."_

Sirius wondered why this song in particular was Remus' favorite… it was kinda sad.

"_The years of care and loyalty_

_Were nothing but a sham it seems_

_The years belie we lived a lie_

_I love you till I die_

_Save me_

_Save me_

_Save me_

_I can't face this life alone_

_Save me_

_Save me_

_Save me_

_I'm naked and I'm far from home." _Sirius stopped the music as he had seen Remus do before.

"Hey!" Remus exclaimed, pouting a bit.

"Stop your pouting. I have an idea." Sirius said. James scoffed.

"That's a new one." He said with a bit of a laugh, dodging the pillow Sirius threw at him.

"No! Really! It's a good one!" Sirius said with his best puppy dog eyes.

"Alright, out with it then!" James said with a laugh.

"Okay. Remus sings lead." Sirius said with a smirk. Remus smirked right back at him.

"Only if you sing the falsetto." He challenged.

"You got it. Now, how are we going to sort out instruments? Because I only play drums." Sirius said, taking out his drumsticks.

"I only play guitar." James said, pulling out his acoustic guitar out from under his bed.

"I play guitar or bass." Peter said, likewise pulling out his instrument.

"Well then I guess I'm playing the piano." Remus said, smiling.

"So, Mooney, whose is Queen, any ways?" Peter asked, randomly strumming a little bass line.

"Well, there's Freddie Mercury. He's lead vocals and piano."

"So, he's the gay one?" Sirius asked.

"Yeah." Remus said, ignoring his slight blush and the slight blush on Sirius's cheeks. "Then there's Brian May. He's guitar and keyboards. So, James, you're basically him." Remus said. "Then there's Roger Taylor, who is rumored to be gay, but, basically you're just sticking to his drumming skills, Sirius." He said with a smirk.

"What else does he play?" Sirius asked with a quirked eyebrow, trying to ignore the gay comment.

"Guitar, bass and keyboards." Remus said with a slight laugh as his friend pouted. "Then there's John Deacon on bass. That would be you, Peter."

"So, are you the only one singing?" James asked. Remus rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Did you not listen to the songs? Here, I'll play another one with lots of all of us singing." Remus said, setting the record to play Seven Seas of Rhye.

"With lots of all of us?" Sirius chided him.

"Yes, now shut up."

"_Fear me you lord and lady preachers  
I descend upon your earth from the skies  
I command your very souls you unbelievers  
Bring before me what is mine  
The seven seas of rhye_

Can you hear me you peers and privy councillors  
I stand before you naked to the eyes  
I will destroy any man who dares abuse my trust  
I swear that you'll be mine  
At the seven seas of rhye

Sister I live and lie for you  
Mister do and I'll die  
You are mine I possess you  
Belong to you forever

Storm the master marathon I'll fly through  
By flash and thunder fire I'll survive  
I'll survive I'll survive  
Then I'll defy the laws of nature  
And come out alive

Begone with you you shod and shady senators  
Give out the good leave out the bad evil cries  
I challenge the mighty titan and his troubadours  
And with a smile  
I'll take you to the seven seas of rhye"

"That better?" Remus asked with a smirk as he saw James' mouth drooping open, as were Sirius' and Peter's.

"I like that song." Sirius stated.

Remus laughed. "Thought you all would. Now, close your mouths before a fly lands in there. We need to pick an audition song."

"How about Crazy Little Thing Called Love?" James suggested.

"Sounds okay to me. Peter? Sirius?" Remus said.

"Absolutley spiffing, Prongsie." Sirius said with a cheeky smile.

"Alrighty then." Peter said with a happy smile. "Wait, how are we supposed to play it? We don't have any music!" Peter exclaimed.

"Do not worry, Mooney comes to the rescue." Remus said, digging in his trunk and pulling out songbooks for each of them. "They were going to be your christmas presents, but I though we could use them now." He said with a smile as he headed to the door. "Well? You lot coming to the Room of Requirements or not?"

A/N: hahaha, this story is going to be fun… review!!! (don't worry, there will be other bands. Black Sabbath, Heart, The Who, and I'm not sure who else I put in there. But I put a little Thcaikovsky in there too… those spiffy ravenclaws.) TTFN! Ta-Ta For Now!!!

Ally


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